Dear April,
After all these years, I think it is finally time that I express my love for you. I don’t often take the time to tell you how much I truly love you – the person you once were, the person you are now and the person you are becoming.
To My Past Self:
I see you. You are worthy, you are lovable, you are enough. It’s okay to make mistakes and it’s okay for things to get messy. Each experience you are having is shaping and molding the beautiful woman you are growing into being. Nothing is permanent and life is constantly changing. That’s not to diminish any of your experiences; all of the experiences you have had and are having – the heartbreaks, the disappointments, the mistakes – are valid and will forever be a part of who you are. Eventually you will forgive yourself for everything and accept yourself fully. Things will begin to get smoother but will never completely settle and there will forever be opportunities for learning and growth.
To My Current Self:
I am so proud of you. You have come so far in the past few years and even the past few months in becoming the strong, connected, grounded and successful woman you are today. I know that you don’t always see this, so I want to remind you of all of your amazing qualities. You should be proud of the successes you have had in your professional life from building a respectable 10+ year accounting career without an accounting degree, to becoming a respected yoga instructor in the Denver yoga community and successfully filling and facilitating 8 yoga retreats, and now preparing to start your first semester of grad school. Aside from your career, you have traveled to 9 countries, some for multiple visits, many being 2nd or 3rd world countries, and you have taken 6 solo international trips. Perhaps most importantly, you have committed yourself to doing the work to continually better yourself, acknowledge your mistakes and weaknesses and turn them into opportunities for growth. You deserve to be loved by someone who has as much love to give you as you have found within yourself. And when you meet that person, he will be ready for you.
To My Future Self:
Be patient with yourself and be easy on yourself. Remember your worth and assert your boundaries – you don’t have to settle for anything that doesn’t align with your true wants, desires and values whether that be in career, friendship or relationship. When you do get into a relationship with someone else, don’t lose sight of your relationship with yourself and all of the work you have done to strengthen it. Continue your practices in and out of relationship, both with your partner and independently. Remember that you are whole, and you have everything you will ever need inside of you.
Never stop loving yourself.
With Love,
April
