France ~ 2023

Cannes

My first visit to Europe was a 2-week vacation with my ex-husband 14 years ago. We spent a week in Italy and a week in Spain, and it was my first time ever leaving the country. I learned a lot on that trip, and I’d thought about returning many times, but hadn’t mainly because of the cost. It is more expensive to fly to Europe, and the cost of everything in Europe is higher than many of the countries I have visited. I tend to gravitate toward second or third world countries firstly for the cultural experience, and secondly because of the low cost of living. This is especially true the past couple of years since I have been doing extended visits. I still maintain my expenses at home while I am away – rent, car insurance, cell phone, etc., so I do my best to mitigate the cost of flights and accommodations by lowering my other costs – primarily food and other groceries.

However, in 2023 an opportunity came along for me to visit Cannes, France that I couldn’t pass up. While I was at Preksha Yoga Ashram in India earlier that year, I met a French woman named Mona, who spent a couple months at the ashram during the three months I was there. We grew close quickly because we spent so much time together every day. We shared a lot of laughs and had some long conversations about some of the challenges I was experiencing at the time. There were a few red flags about her though – which will come up later in the story – that I wish I had listened to better. Mona was in her mid 70’s when I met her, and she was a retired O.R. nurse who had lived most of her life in New York City, working in a hospital that served many high profile and even famous people. She was sassy and a bit pretentious, but most of the time I enjoyed being around her because she made me laugh. Often, though, she was making jokes at the expense of others. There were times that she mocked and made fun of the Indian yoga teachers while we were eating lunch in the same room that they were. I also witnessed her aggressively attack Bhavna, my favorite meditation teacher, during a workshop we attended together. These things bothered me, but I did my best to ignore them and not engage.

Mona celebrated my 40^th birthday with me and a few others. When we were walking back to the ashram after my birthday dinner one night, I mentioned that I was in need of a “real” vacation, not a working vacation like I was on there. She told me I was welcome to stay in her apartment in Cannes the next time she was traveling – she travels during the winter like I do. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but kept it in the back of my mind.

I heard from Mona during the summer after we left the ashram, and she said that her apartment would be available in November and December while she was in New York visiting her son. My original plan was to go to Guatemala to study Spanish that fall, and I had booked my flight after returning from India. But after putting some thought into it, I decided I would be silly to pass up an opportunity like this. Having a place to stay in the south of France would mitigate some of the higher costs that have kept me from spending more time in Europe in the past, and it would be nice to have a bit of a more comfortable getaway in a western culture after my past couple trips. I rebooked my trip to Guatemala to the following Spring, and made arrangements with Mona to stay at her place for the month of November and the first half of December. She requested that I reimburse her for utilities and her house cleaner, which she estimated to be around $300 per month. This was still less than I would pay to rent a place even in a cheaper country, so it still felt doable financially. Also, a couple of my close friends from Denver decided to come visit me while I was there, and agreed to help pitch in for part of the cost of the utilities.

October was one of the most stressful months of my life. I sold my book of clients and had to facilitate transitioning them to the new company and training the new staff on top of my normal workload. I was also struggling with some health problems, which the stress only made worse. So, by the time November rolled around I was more than ready to go. When I arrived in Cannes, my health issued were at their worst. I had been experiencing stress related “flare ups” of severe fatigue, bone pain in my entire body, and flu-like symptoms. My doctor ruled out some of the more obvious conditions with blood tests and eventually suggested that I could have fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia isn’t exactly treatable; the symptoms are just managed through life changes to decrease stress and increase self-care. Unfortunately, the stress of the flight on my body along with the jetlag sent me into more pain and fatigue. But I was hopeful that between reducing my workload and increasing rest and self-care, I would be able to get myself back on track during my time in Cannes.

Mona was at her apartment when I arrived in France; we had intentionally booked our trips to overlap for a couple days so she could show me the ropes before she left. I learned a few basic French phrases before arriving in Cannes, but that was the extent of my ability to communicate in French. Mona assured me that “everyone” in Cannes spoke English. She was quite hospitable those first couple days, and I enjoyed our time together. We walked around the city, she showed me the boardwalk and the market, and we enjoyed a delicious lunch of oysters and soup at her favorite seafood restaurant. She made a list of people I could contact if I needed help with anything. By the time she left, I felt comfortable and settled in.

There ended up being a few hurdles though. My Mexican ex-girlfriend and I had reconnected again a couple weeks before I left Denver. One thing led to another, and I invited her to come visit me in France. To my surprise, she actually came. We hadn’t seen each other in a year. We texted here and there but I was dating other people and doing my best to heal and move on. But we both still had unresolved feelings, so we decided to give it one more try. Sadly, it ended up being the last. The situation was filled with complexities and obstacles that led to a couple of explosive fights that ended our relationship for the last time. It was an extremely painful experience, but it ultimately allowed me to finally let her go and move on.

The second hurdle was Mona. Without going into too much detail, I’ll just say that she turned on me and I decided to leave her apartment after two weeks. I considered returning home especially after my experience with Yajaira, but my friends who were coming to visit talked me into staying. I found an Airbnb in the same neighborhood for a good price, and booked it for the remaining month.

I felt a lot of relief after leaving Mona’s. It was a tough lesson to learn, but I will never again get myself into a situation like that with someone I don’t know well. Despite the detour though, I decided to make the best of the rest of my time in Cannes. By the time I moved into the Airbnb, I only had a few days before my first visitor arrived. I spent my days walking around and exploring Cannes as much as my energy allowed. I bought a pass at a local health club so I could swim laps. I tried out a few restaurants and went to the local market and bought fresh food to eat at home. I began to pull myself out of my burnout/jetlag/heartbreak funk and started to slowly feel better. I was far from 100%, but the intention of the trip was to rest and heal. My work had dwindled down to just a handful of hours per week, which allowed the rest of my time to rest. It was such a gift to have the space and permission in my life to do less. I have spent so much of my life on the go, which is what got me into this debacle to begin with.

The food in Cannes is clean and fresh, which is something I’ve heard about Europe in general. They don’t use pesticides or eat processed food like we do in the US and other countries, so the food is naturally organic. I haven’t eaten dairy for seven years, but I did eat dairy while I was in France. The quality is better, and I my body could tell. The market was one of my favorite parts of Cannes. Not only could I buy fresh, organic fruits, vegetables, bread, meat, cheese, etc., but there were also many vendors who sell freshly prepared foods to carry out and eat at home. The cuisines ranged from French to Italian to Mediterranean. The food is also cheaper than in the US, which was surprising considering I was in Cannes. Cannes is known best for the annual film festival that has been held there for many years which attracts a lot of celebrities not only during the festival but throughout the year. Beautiful palaces and designer shops line the Mediterranean Sea. Cannes is said to be the best place in France to shop – and visitors come from all over the country and other parts of Europe to shop in stores such as Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Armani, and Prada. Cannes isn’t exactly known for authentic French food since it is a tourist destination, but nonetheless nearly every restaurant I dined in was excellent. There are a lot of Italian restaurants and a substantial Italian population since Cannes is only a couple hours from the border of Italy. I ate some of the best pizza of my life during that trip. The cheese from the market was also to die for.

I’m not much of a shopper, and I don’t generally try to visit places that attract a lot of tourists. Thankfully I was there during the off season, so it wasn’t overrun with tourists. I did get to experience the Christmas markets. Wooden structures are set up in the main square of Cannes where vendors come to sell local goods from jewelry, clothing and accessories, Christmas trinkets, and sweets. Food and drinks are also being sold and the entire town is decorated with Christmas decorations. It was quite beautiful, and the weather was not nearly as cold as what I’m accustomed to in Denver. In fact, it got warmer in December than it had been in November, which was a nice surprise. Outside of shopping and dining, there’s not much else to do other than walk the boardwalk and/or sit by the ocean. The views are beautiful but during that time of year the water was a bit too cold for swimming. But since the intention of my time there was to rest and heal, it was a perfect place to be. It was also a nice change of pace to visit a western country with all the conveniences of home. The language barrier was sometimes an inconvenience, but most people do speak at least some English because of the tourism. Having visitors was also a nice change of pace. I generally travel solo, which can get lonely at times. It also pushed me to get out and see a few things outside of Cannes.

Sainte-Marguerite Island

During Christy’s visit (my first visitor from Denver), we decided to take a day trip to Sainte-Marguerite Island, one of the two Lérins Islands that are located just a 15-minute ferry ride from Cannes. Unfortunately, it was a particularly windy day, which made for an uncomfortable visit. The temperature on the island was about 10 degrees cooler than in Cannes, so it was in the low 40’s with high winds that day. We walked around for about an hour and visited a museum which consisted of ruins of a fort and a cathedral. The islands are home to preserves of natural flora and fauna. The views were beautiful, but it would have been a more enjoyable experience during the warmer summer months. We weren’t able to find any open restaurants or cafés to escape the elements since we were there during the off season, so we made our way back to Cannes on the next ferry.

Nice

I took two day trips to Nice, once with each of my visitors. Nice is about a 30-minute train ride from Cannes. The train system is a bit confusing because everything is in French, and the trains and stations can become very crowded during the morning and evening rush hours since it is many people’s way of commuting to and from work and school. I really enjoyed the vibe and architecture of Nice. It’s a much larger city than Cannes, so there’s a lot more to do but it didn’t feel crowded or overwhelming like some cities can. There’s a more diverse and authentic selection of restaurants, and everything we ate was delicious. There is a cute historic “old town” area which has more of the European architecture I was expecting, that is filled with quaint little shops and restaurants. The coast of Nice is very beautiful; the water is turquoise blue. In hindsight I wish I had split my time in the French Riviera between Cannes and Nice.

Eze Village

Reagan (my second visitor from Denver), and I took a day trip to Eze Village, which is about a 45-minute train ride from Cannes. Eze Village is a super special little gem in the French Riviera. The village dates to the Middle Ages. The train drops you off at the base of the mountain, where you can then catch a bus the rest of the way up the windy mountain roads to the village. The tiny village is made up of a few restaurants and shops built into the side of the mountain, which are connected by a network of cobblestone steps. Once you reach the top of the mountain, there is a beautiful succulent garden with breathtaking views of the Mediterranean Sea, the mountain, and the surrounding areas. After we spent some time at the top taking in the views and serenity, we climbed back down and visited the Fragonard Perfume factory for a free tour. Eze is a sweet, peaceful little escape from the hustle and bustle of Cannes or Nice, and I’d highly recommend a visit if you find yourself in the French Riviera.

Antibes

Reagan and I also took a day trip to Antibes, a small city that is a 20-minute train ride from Cannes. Antibes is like Cannes’ more down-to-Earth sister city. The architecture and vibe felt similar, but it seemed like more of a place to live than a destination to visit. The city isn’t filled with designer shops or touristy restaurants. There is a cute old town area which we walked through, but the main attraction for us was the Pablo Picasso Museum. The museum was once a home to Picasso, and it was fun and interesting to explore his art and life portrayed throughout the museum.